As a psychotherapist and clinical manager at turn2me, I meet many people who are curious
about therapy but feel unsure, nervous, or even a bit allergic to the idea of talking about
feelings. If that sounds familiar, you are in very good company. Uncertainty alone can keep
someone from reaching out, even when they know deep down that they could use support.
I want to walk you through what therapy really involves, especially that very first session, and
how our early-intervention, online services at turn2me are designed to make mental health
support feel accessible, human, and less mysterious than it may seem from the outside.
The decision to reach out.
For most people, the hardest step is not the first session; it’s deciding to ask for help.
By the time someone arrives at turn2me, they’ve often gone through weeks, months, or even
years of “maybe it’s not that bad,” “other people have it worse,” or “I should be able to handle
this on my own.” These thoughts are incredibly common, but they can also leave people
carrying far too much alone. From my perspective, choosing to reach out is already a sign of
strength and self-awareness, not failure.
Because we work online and focus on early intervention, people can connect with support
quickly, often before things reach a full crisis point. That early contact can make a huge
difference. Think of it less as “waiting until the roof caves in” and more as calling someone
when you first notice the leak.
The first session
People often imagine a first therapy session as a kind of interrogation, test, or emotional pop
quiz. In reality, it’s a collaborative conversation. My aim, and the aim of our team at turn2me,
is to create a space where you can simply be human: confused, upset, unsure, hopeful,
exhausted, or even “not sure why I’m here.”
Broadly, a first session involves four things:
1: Meeting each other as people
We start with introductions: who you are, who I am, and what I can offer. I outline:
o What therapy with me (or with turn2me) typically looks like
o How confidentiality works and its limits
o The types of supports we provide (e.g. one-to-one therapy, group supports, online tools)
This isn’t small talk; it’s about building enough safety and clarity so that you feel you can talk
openly. You do not have to perform wellness, arrive with a perfectly organised life story, or
have your feelings neatly alphabetised.
2: Understanding what brings you here now
I’ll invite you to share:
o What has been happening recently
o What feels hardest at the moment
o Any particular triggers or recent events
Some people arrive with a clear, rehearsed story. Others say, “I don’t know where to start.”
Both are completely okay. Part of my role is to help you find language for what you’re feeling,
even if you arrive with nothing but a sense that something isn’t right. You can begin exactly
where you are.
3: Exploring your context – not just your symptoms
We may talk about:
o Your relationships and support system
o Work, study, or family pressures
o Previous experiences with mental health or therapy
o What has helped you cope so far, even if those strategies are a bit “messy”
I’m not looking for what’s “wrong” with you; I’m looking to understand how you’ve been trying
to manage, what has helped you survive so far, and where things have become
overwhelming or stuck.
4: Beginning to shape a plan together
Before we end that first session, we’ll usually:
o Clarify what you’d like to change or understand better
o Talk about realistic goals (for example: sleeping better, feeling less on edge,
managing anxiety in social situations, making a difficult decision)
o Decide on a way forward: further individual sessions, group supports, self-
help resources, or a combination
The goal is that you leave the first session with a sense of direction, even if we don’t have all
the answers yet. Therapy rarely hands you a fully labelled map on day one, but it can help
you find the next step.
What therapy is not
There are a few myths that often stop people from reaching out. Let’s gently retire a few of
them.
1. Therapy is not judgment.
You don’t have to present the “clean” version of your life. The parts you’re least proud of are often the parts that need the most compassion and attention.
2. Therapy is not advice-giving from on high.
As a psychotherapist, I’m not here to tell you how to live your life. I may offer
perspectives, tools, or education, but the choices remain yours. Therapy is about
helping you become more connected to your own values, needs, and decisions.
3. Therapy is not only for people in crisis.
At turn2me, we focus heavily on early intervention. Many people come to us because
they’re starting to struggle with anxiety, low mood, stress, or loneliness – they’re not
necessarily at breaking point, and that’s exactly when support can be most effective.
4. Therapy is not a quick fix.
You may feel some relief after the first conversation – simply being heard can be
powerful – but deeper change tends to be gradual and cumulative. That’s normal and
healthy.
After the first session
After the initial meeting, therapy starts to become more tailored to you. Depending on your
needs and the service you’re using at turn2me, the work might involve:
- 1. Building emotional awareness and language
Many people arrive saying things like “I feel numb,” “I feel everything too much,” or “I don’t
even know what I feel.” Therapy helps you:
o Notice patterns in your emotions, thoughts, and body
o Understand why certain situations trigger strong reactions
o Begin to name emotions more precisely, not just “stressed,” but perhaps “overwhelmed,” “frightened,” “ashamed,” or “sad”
This awareness is the foundation for change. You can’t shift what you can’t see.
- 2. Exploring underlying beliefs and experiences
Often, we find that present difficulties have roots in:
o Early experiences of criticism, neglect, or instability
o Repeated patterns in relationships
o Cultural, social, or family messages about what it means to be “strong,” “successful,” or “good”
We look at these with curiosity, not blame. The question isn’t “What’s wrong with me?” but
“What happened to me, and how did I learn to cope?” From there, we can gently examine
whether those old strategies still serve you.
- 3. Developing practical tools and strategies
Alongside exploration, therapy usually includes very practical elements, such as:
o Techniques to manage anxiety and panic
o Ways to ground yourself when overwhelmed
o Sleep and routine strategies
o Communication tools for difficult conversations
o Planning small, realistic steps towards changes you want to make
At turn2me, we combine this individual work with online group supports and
psychoeducational content such as articles and meditations, so you can continue learning
and practising between sessions. Change does not only happen in the therapy hour; it often
happens in the ordinary moments afterwards, when you pause, notice, choose differently, or
simply take a breath instead of pushing through.
- 4. Strengthening connection and support
Feeling alone with your struggles can intensify distress. Therapy is partly about:
o Feeling less isolated
o Learning how to ask for and receive support
o Identifying relationships in your life that feel safe and nourishing – and those that may
be draining you
In our online setting, people often find it easier to open up from the privacy of their own
space, which can be an important bridge towards wider connection.
Online therapy at turn2me makes support more accessible
One of the core commitments at turn2me is to make mental health supports available to
everyone, as far as possible. From my dual viewpoint as therapist and clinical manager, a
few elements are especially important:
- 1. Lowering practical barriers
Because our supports are online, you don’t need to:
o Travel to a clinic
o Explain to anyone where you’re going
o Sit in a waiting room wondering who might see you
For many people with busy schedules, caring responsibilities, physical health issues, or
transport difficulties, this can make the difference between getting support and going without
it. It also means you can access help from a familiar space, slippers and cosy blanket
optional but entirely understandable.
- 2. Early intervention, not last resort
We actively encourage people to come to us before things feel unbearable. That might
mean:
o Reaching out when your mood has dipped for a few weeks
o Looking for support when anxiety is starting to affect sleep or work
o Seeking help when you notice you’re withdrawing from friends or activities
The earlier we can work together, the more options we usually have. Small, timely
adjustments can prevent a lot of pain down the line. You do not need to wait until you are
“bad enough” to deserve support.
- 3. Range of supports for different needs
As a service, we know that one size does not fit all. Depending on what’s happening for you,
we may recommend:
o One-to-one online therapy sessions
o Online group supports where you can share and learn with others facing similar
issues
o Digital tools and resources to help you build skills and insight between sessions
o Signposting to other services when you need something beyond our scope (for
example, crisis services, specialist supports, or in-person care)
My role as a clinical manager involves making sure that what we offer is safe, ethical, and
responsive, and that people are steered towards the right type of support for their situation.
How you might feel during the process
People often ask, “Will I feel better straight away?” The honest answer is sometimes yes,
sometimes not immediately.
o In the early sessions, simply naming what’s going on and feeling understood can
bring relief.
o At other times, touching painful feelings or memories can make you feel a bit worse
before you feel better. That doesn’t mean therapy is “not working”; it often means
we’re getting closer to what really needs attention.
I see therapy as a process of making room for your full self: the parts you’re comfortable with
and the parts you’d rather hide under the emotional equivalent of a very large blanket. That
can be uncomfortable, but it’s also where growth and healing tend to happen.
Throughout, you should feel that:
o You can say if something doesn’t feel helpful
o You can slow down, pause, or take breaks from certain topics
o Your therapist is open to feedback and willing to adjust the pace and focus with you
When therapy might not be enough on its own
Part of ethical practice, and part of my role, is recognising when someone needs more than
what we can offer in an online setting.
That might be:
o A need for urgent crisis support
o Complex physical or mental health needs that require a multidisciplinary team
o A level of risk that requires more intensive, in-person care
In those cases, we don’t simply say “this isn’t for you” and close the door. We look at how to
connect you with the most appropriate supports. We’re honest about what we can and
cannot safely provide.
If you or someone else is in immediate danger, or you feel unable to
stay safe, call 112 or 999, go to your nearest emergency department, contact Samaritans on
116 123, or text HELLO to 50808 for Text About It support.
Thinking about starting therapy?
If you’re considering therapy with turn2me, or simply thinking about talking to someone for
the first time, here are a few thoughts from my perspective:
o You do not need to have the “right words” or a clear story to begin.
o You are allowed to be ambivalent, to want help and also feel afraid of it.
o You can say, “I’m not sure what I need; I just know I can’t keep going like this.” That’s
often more than enough to start.
Therapy is not about becoming a different person. It’s about becoming more fully yourself,
with more understanding, more choice, and more support.
Reaching out for help is an act of courage. My colleagues and I at turn2me feel privileged to
be alongside people as they take that step, whether it’s their very first session or a return to therapy after some time away.
If this article has made you wonder whether support might
help, that wondering is enough reason to reach out. You do not have to figure it all out alone.
Turn2Me, Lifeline, Online!